An All Natural Water Birth Story {From one of our own!}

Dean Alphonse  entered this world on the morning of Tuesday, December 10, 2013 at Magnolia Birth Center, in Houston, TX.

This was my third pregnancy, and was thankfully un-eventful.

Our first son was born via "emergency" c-section in January, 2008, due to a failed induction for "big baby" at three days past his due date. In the year following his birth, I discovered ICAN, and decided that any future children I bore would be born vaginally, baring a TRUE medical necessity.

Three years later, we discovered we were expecting our second child, and my search for a VBAC provider began in earnest. Due to insurance restrictions (darn HMOs!), I was forced to find an OB and hospital that would allow me to give birth vaginally after a c-section. I was fortunate to give birth to our second son via hospital VBAC in September, 2011.

While I will always appreciate the fact I was able to give birth vaginally, I felt extreme anxiety and intimidation in the hospital setting. While most of the nurses were supportive of my choices, some were very unsupportive of my decision. The on-call OB was one I knew to be anti-VBAC, as well, though fortunately she did not try to force me into a repeat section. My OB approved birth plan was laughed at, so the experience was far more stressful than I had hoped for. I swore I would not have another hospital birth, if at all possible.

Within months of my hospital VBAC birth, a new birth center opened up on my side of town, and they allowed VBAC births in the center! I attended their grand opening, and decided that this was where I would give birth, if we were blessed with a third child. 

It didn't take long to take that opportunity... My VBAC son was 19 months old when we discovered baby number three was on his way! I contacted Magnolia Birth Center, and began making plans to give birth there. I felt immediately at ease with Aly, Patty and their support team!

My due date was set as December 17th, 2013, though I knew in my heart this baby would arrive about a week early. As the weeks passed, and we reached "term," I patiently waited for any sign of impending labor. At 37 weeks, I began having regular Braxton Hicks "practice" contractions throughout the day, every day.

On Monday, December 9th, I took a hot shower before bed, and my bag of waters broke, causing a trickle with mild contractions. I woke Ari up at midnight to let him know that my water had broken, and he called his parents to come over and stay with the boys while we made our way to the birth center. I called my doula, Sarah, and Patty at the birth center to let them know labor had begun. Patty asked me to come in so she could check my progress, and make sure my water had broken.

We arrived at about 1:30am, and my water started gushing as soon as I sat on the exam table; there was no doubt that my water bag had broken, and thankfully it was clear of meconium. I was only dilated to 1.5 cm, though, and at 2:00 am, I was sent home to eat, rest and labor through the night.

By the time we returned home, my clothes were soaked, so I returned to the shower once again. I labored in the bathroom for the rest of the night, drinking water and coconut water, but unable to eat food. Suddenly, labor became more intense, and my body started pushing with contractions. I had Ari call Patty and Sarah to tell them I was going back to the birth center at 5:00am, and we left the house once again.

We arrived at the birth center by 5:30, and I was still involuntarily pushing through contractions. Patty started filling the birth tub, and had me get onto the bed for a cervical check. I was 7-8cm dilated, and unable to stop my body from pushing with each contraction.

Around 6:30am, there was enough water filled, I was helped into the birth tub, and within three contractions, my son started crowning. I don't remember how many total pushes it took, nor do I have a concept of "how long" I pushed, but I know it didn't take long before his head was out. I had to flip onto "all fours" to get his shoulders out, but it did not take long to push the rest of him out once I was in the right position. **Weeks after writing this down, I discovered that Ari had videotaped the water birth. The pushing phase was under 10 minutes long.

Dean completed his journey at 6:55am, and was placed on my chest. I couldn't believe how quickly and peacefully he arrived! We were assisted to the bed, where we snuggled for a while, and let his cord return his much needed blood to his body. Ari cut the cord, and followed Aly as she performed his newborn assessment. Much to our surprise, Dean weighed in at 10lbs 3oz, and 22" long - our biggest baby, by far!

Patty and Sarah accompanied me, as I desperately wanted to shower. Once I cleaned up, I made my way to the area where Aly was finishing up the newborn assessment. Everyone laughed, and said they had not had a mother come out before to see part of the newborn assessment!

A little after 9:15, we began packing our bags to return home, so our two big boys could meet their baby brother.

I couldn't have asked for a better beginning to our new family of five!

-Angela

The War Against SuperMoms

You’ve all probably seen the endless array of blogs, articles and forum discussions about new moms.  They usually have an incredibly original title such as ’5 Things New Mom’s Won’t Get Done’.  There are two things these articles all have in common. The first being a universal belief that our homes (and ourselves) will be, and should be, a disaster zone.

The most recent blog post I stumbled upon is titled "To My Post Partum Self: Things I Wish I'd Known" and of course, the author makes a couple fairly decent points. But I'm not here to point out the decent, but rather the ass backwards and annoying. To quote an excerpt from the post:

“Don’t clean.

Your house will still be messy in five years. I am sorry, but it’s true. So when your baby sleeps, take a nap. Read a book. Masturbate. Look at pictures of clean houses on Pinterest. Look at pictures of clean houses on Pinterest while you masturbate.  But don’t clean.”

As a new mom, you will usually be painted as a haggard, puke-covered mess who never leaves her disorderly house, doesn’t get any laundry finished, and never has time to make supper.  You will be told that anything else is unheard of.  You will be encouraged to look down upon ‘supermoms’ that seemingly ‘do it all’.  You’re told to ignore the dirty dishes, always nap when baby naps, and disregard basic hygiene.

Which brings me to my next point. This is another quote from the blog:

“Be a hater.
And those moms who appear to have it all together? The size six supermoms who appear perky and well-rested? The ones who haul big designer diaper bags brimming with healthy snacks and water and sunscreen and extra outfits and hand sanitizer? It is okay to wish them small misfortunes, like fecal incontinence or eye herpes.
You are on your way.”

What the actual fuck?  Why is it perfectly acceptable to despise a new mom who manages to clean? In this age of acceptance, how did we suddenly morph from the 1950’s expectation of a perfectly clean house, waxed eyebrows, and dinner on the table at five, to pure loathing?  Please don’t get me wrong; I don’t give a rats ass if your house isn’t picked up. I could honestly care less if there are dirty dishes in your sink, toys strewn from your bathroom to the living room, and laundry piles everywhere.  But since when should moms be looked down upon for cleaning? Is it just me, or is this completely the opposite of what we should be telling mothers to do?  Shouldn’t we be assuring women that whatever they manage to get accomplished with a miniature poop machine is JUST FINE? When did the apparent 'Supermom' become the target of abhorrence in the mom world? 

Now brace yourselves, because you’re going to hate me and wish eye herpes upon my dastardly soul: I am a mother to a 2 year old and a 3 month old, and my house isn’t dirty.  My laundry is clean and folded, dishes washed, floors vacuumed and frames dusted.  I run a cake decorating business out of my home.  I breastfeed exclusively, I puree my children’s baby food. I give them mostly healthy snacks and meals.  I feel well rested. And yes, science forbid, I even carry sunscreen, water, and extra outfits in my Coach brand bag. I don’t have a Pinterest account because seriously, the last thing I need is another online addiction.  I birthed my children naturally with a doula and midwife. I cook dinner almost every night. My children's designer clothes are organized by season and color. Holy shit… I even work out almost every morning. 

Go right ahead, hate me.  But before you do, I ask that you continue to read the rest of the post before wishing on me the ‘small misfortune’ of fecal incontinence.  

Because guess what? 99% of the time I feel completely and totally inadequate.  I see moms who do more than me.  I let the TV babysit my toddler when I have cakes to decorate, and often I am up until 3am working on Friday nights.  I don’t shower on a daily basis unless I have to leave my house.  I fall into my bed, exhausted, at 8:30pm so that maybe I will have the energy to work out in the morning because I’m FAR from a size 6.  I don’t always buy organic.  I breastfeed, cloth diaper, and make my own baby food for many reasons, but also because I’m CHEAP.  I buy my kids designer clothes second hand, and I shamelessly use coupon and rewards points. I only own two pairs of jeans that fit. I look well rested in the morning because I am, I have been given an awesome little baby who enjoys sleeping at night as much as I do.  I chose to endure the pain of natural birth because the thought of a cesarean scares the ever lovin' shit out of me and I'm a pansy. I scream into my pillow when my toddler pees on the kitchen table. My marriage is falling apart.

Sure, on the outside I look like I’ve got it all together.  I don’t.  I clean because it is a welcome distraction from everything else that is going to shit. I don't have an ulterior motive.

Now don’t you think that maybe, instead of shooting daggers at the women who ‘appear to have it all together’, you should start accepting that maybe you don’t know it all?  EVERY mother is fighting her own battles.  Instead of sneering at the mom in the park feeding her baby homemade food, you could consider that maybe she can’t afford expensive jarred baby food.  When you see that mom with the perfect hairstyle at the grocery store, instead of immediately wishing anal leakage on her, maybe bear in mind that she may have just had the only haircut she’s been able to manage in the last year.  Maybe you should tone down the note of disgust in your voice when you accuse your friend of being a 'supermom'. 

We are all working our asses off to make our children happy.  Some of us have different priorities, stress relief techniques, and habits. And that’s ok. 

We DO NOT have to be haters.

-Shalana

Removing Diaper Cream from Cloth Diapers

Rule #1 of cloth diapering is Do Not Use Diaper Cream. I didn't start putting cloth on my first daughter until she was about 20 months old, so I didn't know all the in's and out's of the correct process. When she started getting her two year molars she got a horrible, painful diaper rash. I of course, panicked and liberally applied Bourdeauxs Butt Paste. I assumed since I was using a rayon liner that it wouldn't be an issue. WRONG! The butt paste went through the liner and absorbed into the fleece and made them repel moisture. I tried stripping them with baking soda and vinegar, used Dawn dishwashing liquid in my washer, and rinsed them a countless amount of times. Nothing worked until I put in a little elbow grease.

The first step is to determine if the diapers are actually repelling moisture. Simply dripping water on them and watching it bead up doesn't necessarily mean they aren't absorbent anymore. With most pocket diapers (I use Alvas), you need to apply a little pressure as if the diaper is flush against babes bottom. If water still doesn't absorb easily you need to do some work on them!

You will need some blue Dawn dishwashing liquid, and a stiff brush. I used a nail brush which worked well, but you can use just about anything with stiff bristles.


Wet the diapers and squirt on a little Dawn. Then scrub the shit out of it! Don't be afraid to get nasty! (pun intended)  You'll need to scrub in all different directions, and don't be afraid of damaging the fleece on the diaper, you won't. After you've scrubbed, rinse the diaper as well as you can and wash like normal, adding a couple extra rinses to your cycle. Depending on the amount of grease from the diaper cream you may need to repeat this until the diaper is absorbent 
again. 

Remember to ALWAYS use a cloth diaper friendly rash cream, or coconut oil, with your cloth diapers! 

-Shalana

Baby Cakes: A Natural Birth Story

As you fantastic readers are soon to discover, I am a huge proponent of natural birth. No this isn't because I have a 'I'm better than you' syndrome, nor am I one of the delusional women who will tell you that birth is a painless experience. No no no. It's because I am such a Type A pain in the ass that I feel an unexplainable urge to research as much as I can on almost every new adventure that I embark on. Birth definitely being one of the most life changing of all. And my findings yielded a definite conclusion that cannot be disputed even by the most surgery happy OB: natural birth is safer for mom, for baby, and for billfold. After deciding on a natural birth I still ended up being induced with my first daughter due to pre-eclampsia. I had no pain medication and ended up with a baby in the NICU and a not so pleasant birth experience. The second time went quite different (and much faster and crazier!).

Here is my story.

On wednesday, June 26th, The day before I delivered baby cakes #2 I was getting a lot of stuff done around the house. I mowed the lawn, pulled weeds while squatting, helped my friend shampoo my carpets, cleaned out all my daughters toy boxes and reorganized them. I was hoping I would start feeling some contractions but I didn't feel anything other than low pressure when I would walk. I went to sleep that night and woke at 1am with very minimal cramping. A friend of mine had been induced and delivered her daughter the evening before and we have the same doula, T. She was still awake and coming down from that birth so I chatted with her a little bit and made a joke 'you need to get some rest and get ready for the next birth!' And then of course reassured her that I was feeling nothing and that I was sure it would be a few days at least. I read a couple birth stories online, checked Facebook and I went back to sleep around 2am.

At 3:30 I woke up with a crampy feeling. I felt a little like I needed to poop, or let out a huge fart. I tried and failed to use the bathroom and still felt crampy but I was noticing a sort of regularity. At 4am I decided to take a hot shower to see if they would subside and in the meantime I had my husband, L, start timing them with an iPhone app. The shower did not help stop them but rather sped them up. I was still in denial and was sure I was just having gas pains. Who wants to call their midwife in from almost 4 hours away for a fart? L on the other hand, after seeing the contractions were every 2 minutes, called our midwife P, and doula T. P lives 250 miles away and left her house immediately. T headed to our house as well.

At this point I finished showering and got ready for the day. My stomach was growling so I asked L to make bacon and eggs. The contractions started to get more intense, to the point that I had to concentrate through them, and were lasting 35-40 seconds. T arrived quickly and set up some essential oils. P called the local student midwife, J, and she also headed out to the house. When food was finished it no longer sounded appetizing so I ate a couple bites of Greek yogurt instead. T suggested we walk around outside to see if that would slow things down in cool air. About 5 minutes of walking outside I vomited. This is when J pulled up to the house. We went inside, she checked my vitals and called P to update her.

I was in the zone now. I had to vocalize through contractions and was swaying and leaning on a ball. It was at this point that the decision was made to transfer to the hospital since it was obvious that P wasn't going to make it in time, and J didn't feel 100% comfortable catching the baby. I wasn't happy about the transfer, especially since nothing was wrong. I went along with it though. L called my grandma to come over from a couple houses down and watch my 21 month old daughter. L and J laid down the seats in the back of my car and threw pillows and blankets back there so I would be somewhat comfortable. We loaded up, me on my knees and elbows surrounded by J and T. P called ahead to the hospital and told them we were on our way and I was in precipitous labor. By now it was after 7am.

L drove the 25 miles at over 100mph to the hospital as I was screaming in the back and trying my hardest not to push. With every contraction the pressure was unbearable but T kept telling me to keep my chin up and don't push. The car ride was definitely the most excruciating ride of my life. When we got to the hospital L pulled into the ambulance bay and we were met by the ER staff and a stretcher. I piled on and the nurses literally sprinted me through the halls while I was vocalizing (loudly!) through contractions. Once we made it to a delivery room I was checked and told I was complete. The on call doctor wasn't there yet and I was told not to push. I climbed onto the bed backwards and started pushing on my hands and knees anyway.

P arrived then, handed them my medical chart, asked who was on charge, and saw that baby was crowning, and that the nurses (all 8 or 9 of them) were just standing there staring at me. One nurse approached me in the middle of a particularly brutal contraction with a tourniquet and told me she was starting an IV. I told her no, and she said I had to. I yelled no at her and she retreated. My water broke during a push with a very audible pop, and the fluid was clear. P knew the baby was coming and the doctor wasn't going to make it, so she gloved up, and told me to turn around on the bed since I was fighting gravity. I flipped around and the next contraction I pushed out the head. She had a very tight nuchal cord which P removed, and the next contraction her body was born at 7:51am.

The on call doctor walked in when I had the baby on my chest. L got to announce that it was a girl and the doctor clamped and cut the cord before it stopped pulsating. I delivered the placenta after the doctor tugged on the cord, and was given an injection of pitocin and dose of cytotec. The drugs were unnecessary since I did not have much bleeding. I had a very minor first degree tear which he sutured, even though it did not require stitches. The nurses did all the checks on baby while she was on my chest and I had to be quite firm with them when I declined a bath and nursery visit. She was 6 pounds, 14.5 ounces and 19.5" long.

She latched on and nursed for 2 hours straight while the nurses left us totally alone in the delivery room and I chatted with P, T, J and R (the other midwife who came from Montana as well but left after P). L made a run to the cafeteria to get me some bacon. We moved to the room shortly after and I got a shower, and cleaned up. I still can't believe how great I felt immediately after giving birth. The thing that hurt the worst was my throat from vocalizing! Recovery from the second birth was amazingly quick and easy, I felt 100% about 5 hours later.

I didn't get the peaceful home birth I wanted. Instead I got a crazy awesome story to tell everyone (even if they don't want to hear it). Sometimes things don't always go according to plan, but it's important to know what you want and to roll with the punches! I've got two beautiful, healthy little girls and that's what matters the most.

xoxo
-S